The Unfortunate Orphans
by Sean91
Summary: The Baudelaires have once again escaped from the clutches of Count Olaf. Mr. Poe takes them far away to a large mansion in the fishing village of Collinsport, Maine. The Collins family will become the new guardians of the Baudelaire orphans. Will Count Olaf find them and use more of his tricks to take the Baudelaire fortune and also the entire Collins estate?
1. Chapter 1

**The Unfortunate Orphans**

**Chapter 1  
**

This story is a crossover of the 1960's gothic soap opera Dark Shadows and the book series/movie A series of Unfortunate Events. It takes place primarily in the Dark Shadows universe and is written in the soap opera format.

* * *

_ "The dawn of a new morning at Collinwood. It is unknown to everybody that a series of unfortunate events are about to happen at the Great House on the Collins estate. Nobody knows what those events will be, their causes, or the end result of those events. All that is known is that three orphans will be living at Collinwood and that they will arrive this afternoon."_

Roger and Elizabeth are in the drawing room of Collinwood discussing the orphans.

"Do you know anything about these orphans?" asked Roger in his usual pompous tone of voice.

"I didn't get much information when I was talking to the orphans' financial banker, Mr. Poe. What I know is that the eldest girl's name is Violet Baudelaire, the middle boy's name is Klaus Baudelaire, and that the youngest one is Sunny Baudelaire," said Elizabeth

"Sounds like three kids that I never heard about," said Roger. "When are they arriving?"

"Sometime this afternoon," replied Elizabeth

"I hope they don't act anything like David?" said Roger. He looked worried, as if the orphans might team up with David and discover every secret on the Collins estate. He poured himself a sherry and quickly drank it down.

"I don't know about that Roger, all I know is that we are to take care of them and that they have a vast fortune which they will receive once the eldest orphan, Violet turns 18," Elizabeth replied.

"How are you going to tell the rest of the family about these orphans?" asked Roger.

"I have decided to keep it a surprise," said Elizabeth.

"Keep it a surprise!" exclaimed Roger.

"Yes Roger, a surprise. However, I will tell Dr. Hoffman and Barnabas," replied Elizabeth in a calm tone of voice.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the Old House, Barnabas is sitting in his usual thinking pose in his usual chair in the parlor. He couldn't believe that it had been a week since he had been cured from his vampire curse. He remembered how way back in 1796, he shot Angelique and believing that she would die, Angelique placed the vampire curse on him and that everybody who loved him would die. Now for the first time since then, he could walk in the daylight and see his own reflection in the mirror.

His thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door. He got up and walked into the foyer, and opened the door. It was Liz.

"Good morning Cousin Elizabeth," said Barnabas.

"Good morning Cousin Barnabas. Do you mind if I come in?" said Elizabeth.

"No I don't mind. Come in," said Barnabas, gesturing for her to come inside. He closed the door once she walked past him.

"So what brings you here so early in the morning?" asked Barnabas.

"I have some imporant news to tell you," replied Elizabeth.

"Important?"

"There will be three orphans arriving at Collinwood this afternoon. Their names are Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire," explained Liz.

"The Baudelaires?" asked Barnabas in disbelief.

"Their mansion was destroyed in a fire a couple months ago and their parents died in the fire," continued Elizabeth.

"How unfortunate," said Barnabas.

"You sound as if you knew the Baudelaires Cousin Barnabas," said Elizabeth.

"I'm sorry if it sounded that way. My ancestor knew the Baudelaires back in 1795 and 1796 just before he went off to England. They lived in Collinsport at the time." explained Barnabas. "They left shortly before my ancestor left Collinsport due to the events that happened during that time."

"What events if I may ask?" asked Elizabeth.

"No one knows of the terrible events that happened other than the death of most of the Collins family of the time. Anyway, is there anything else that I need to know about the Baudelaire orphans," said Barnabas.

"Yes, they have a rather large sum of money that will become theirs once Violet turns 18," said Elizabeth.

"Is Violet the eldest of the orphans?" asked Barnabas

"Yes she is Cousin Barnabas. Anyway I'd better get back to Collinwood. Breakfast is almost ready. You should come to Collinwood and have breakfast with the rest of the family," said Elizabeth.

"I'd love to Cousin Elizabeth," said Barnabas. He grabbed his coat and his wolf's-head cane, then left the house with Elizabeth.

* * *

Later that morning, Barnabas arrived back at the Old House with Julia after breakfast.

"Barnabas, what do you wish to tell me?" asked Julia. Apparently, Barnabas had told her that he was going to tell her something important once they were back at the Old House.

"It's about the Baudelaires. Their mansion had caught fire a couple of months ago and three children are orphaned because of the fire. They are coming here to Collinwood to stay," explained Barnabas.

"Collinwood, but why?" asked Julia.

"Cousin Elizabeth didn't tell me that much about the orphans except that their names are Violet, Klaus, and Sunny. Violet is the oldest and once she turns 18, they will inherit the Baudelaire fortune," said Barnabas.

"Somebody must be after them if they are coming to live at Collinwood," said Julia.

"Nobody knows if anybody is after the orphans or not, but if anybody is after them, I swear that I will protect the orphans," said Barnabas.

"Be careful Barnabas, you aren't a vampire anymore," said Julia.

"I know Julia. We should just keep a close watch on the Baudelaires for the time being," said Barnabas.

"That sounds like a plan Barnabas," said Julia.

Meanwhile, back at Collinwood, David was reviewing secret letter from a mysterous man. This man was named Lemony Snicket telling him of three orphans named Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire. There were also some pictures of the kids that were delivered with the letter. The letter was for David's aunt, but he had sneaked downstairs to get the mail before Elizabeth could.

Suddenly there was a knock at the door. David hid the letter and pictures before opening the door. It was Vicki and Carolyn.

"Hello David, mind if we come in," said Carolyn.

"Sure," said David. The two girls entered David's bedroom.

"We were wondering what you were doing?" asked Carolyn.

"Oh, I was just thinking," said David.

"Thinking about what?" asked Vicki.

"Just about some things," said David.

"What things?" asked Vicki. She knew that David seemed to be hiding something.

"Just some things," said David.

"David, I don't like it when you hide things from me, now what were you thinking?" asked Vicki.

"Just about three orphans and the fact that they're arriving at Collinwood this afternoon," said David.

"Who told you that three orphans would arrive at Collinwood this afternoon?" asked Vicki scoldinly.

"I just felt it," said David.

"David, I just think you're being silly. There are no orphans arriving at Collinwood this afternoon," said Vicki

"Maybe you should get out of the house for a while. I'll see if my mother will let me take you to Bangor tomorrow," said Carolyn

"Will you!" exclaimed David. He suddenly got excited, apparently forgetting about the Baudelaires.

"I will," said Carolyn. The blond girl had a smile on her face.

* * *

That afternoon, there was a knock on the door as was expected. Elizabeth walked into the foyer and opened the door. It was the Baudelaire orphans and Mr. Poe. Violet was the tallest of the orphans and had brown hair and brown eyes. Klaus was a few inches shorter than Violet, but had the same color eyes and hair. Sunny was just an infant. She had four sharp teeth, brown eyes, and blond hair.

"Excuse me, but are you Elizabeth Colins Stoddard?" asked Mr. Poe.

"Yes I am please come in," said Elizabeth.

Mr. Poe and the Baudelaire children enter the foyer. The kids seem to look at every detail in the foyer from the chandelier, the grandfather clock, the front doors, the doors to the drawing room, the stairs and landing, and the portrait of Barnabas Collins.

* * *

That's the end of Chapter 1. Chapter 2 will be up shortly with the Baudelaires meeting the Collins family.


	2. Chapter 2

**Dark Shadows - The Unfortunate Orphans**

**Chapter 2  
**

The Baudelaires are getting use to their new home, and there is proof that somebody is after them.

* * *

_ "It is afternoon at Collinwood. The Baudelaire orphans have arrived at Collinwood with Mr. Poe. Still, nobody knows that a series of unfortunate events are about to take place at the Great House on the Collins Estate. Meanwhile, the Baudelaire orphans get used to their new home."_

Violet, Klaus, and Sunny seem to look at every detail in the foyer from the chandelier, the grandfather clock, the front doors, the doors to the drawing room, the stairs and landing, and the portrait of Barnabas Collins. Violet walked up to the portrait and stared at it with great curiosity.

"Who is that in the portrait?" asked Violet, referring to Barnabas's portrait.

"That is our ancestor Barnabas Collins," said Elizabeth. "He lived here in the late 1700's. He went off to England in 1796. The last ancestor of the English branch of the family, who greatly resembles the man in that portrait, is named after him. He came here from England about a year ago and currently lives at the Old House."

"The Old House?" asked Klaus.

"The Old House was the original family home before Collinwood was completed in early 1796. Nobody had lived in that house ever since Collinwood was finished and the house became almost unlivable by the time Barnabas had arrived from England. Barnabas had a servant restore the Old House and that servant did a damn good job. It looks just like it did back in the 1790's," explained Elizabeth. "I don't know why it was called the Old House, but it probably was because it was the older mansion on the Collins estate."

All three kids were now staring at Barnabas's portrait, wondering what the meaning of the portrait was.

* * *

"This will be your new home kids," said Mr. Poe. "Call me if you need anything."

"Thank you Mr. Poe for bringing them here. I'll make sure they're taken care of," said Elizabeth.

"Thank you Mrs. Stoddard. Well, I must be off. I'd like to make it up to Bangor before nightfall," said Mr. Poe.

"Well, I shouldn't keep you waiting any longer. Goodbye Mr. Poe," said Elizabeth.

"Goodbye Mrs. Stoddard," said Mr. Poe, shaking Elizabeth's hand. He left through the front door. A few moments later, the engine of Mr. Poe's car is heard starting and the car drives off a moment later.

Sunny babbled something that meant "I love this house." Klaus and Violet are speechless of what Sunny said.

"Well kids, welcome to your new home. I'm the mistress of the house. You can call me Mrs. Stoddard," said Elizabeth. "Have you guys eaten before you came here?"

"Yes, Mr. Poe took us to the Blue Whale for lunch. They've got really good seafood," said Violet.

"The Blue Whale is known for its great seafood. Anyway, I had Mrs. Johnson, our servant, prepare two rooms for you kids and I have Carolyn's old crib ready in one of the rooms for Sunny to sleep in. I'll have Mrs. Johnson show you to your rooms," said Elizabeth.

"Thank you Mrs. Stoddard," said Violet.

"I'll be upstairs if you need me. Feel free to wait in the drawing room until Mrs. Johnson comes," said Elizabeth. She went upstairs.

* * *

That evening, the Baudelaires were in the drawing room thinking about their new home. They were sitting in the comfortable sofa next to the fireplace.

"Violet, do you think that we're really safe from Count Olaf?" asked Klaus.

"Anything's possible Klaus. Count Olaf found us at our last two homes. He might find us here too. It could be a matter of hours or days before he arrives here," replied Violet.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. The Baudelaires knew it had to be Count Olaf judging by the fearful looks on their faces.

"No way! Olaf couldn't be here already!" shouted Klaus.

"Let's hide behind the drapes," said Violet. The three children hid behind the drapes as another knock sounded.

"Why can't anybody answer the door," complained Mrs. Johnson as she entered the foyer to answer the door. She opened the door to reveal Barnabas standing on the other side.

"Why hello Barnabas, what brought you here this evening?" asked Mrs. Johnson.

"Why yes Mrs. Johnson, I was wondering if the Baudelaires are here yet? I'd like to get Cousin Elizabeth's permission to speak to them," asked Barnabas.

"They arrived this afternoon. Why don't you come in. I'll go and get Mrs. Stoddard."

"Certainly," replied Barnabas. Barnabas entered the foyer and looked around.

A few moments later, Elizabeth came downstairs.

"Hello Barnabas, I've heard that you wanted to meet the Baudelaires," said Elizabeth.

"I do indeed Cousin Elizabeth," said Barnabas.

"They were in the drawing room the last time I checked on them," said Elizabeth.

The Baudelaires left their hiding place and walked into the foyer.

"They must be the Baudelaires," said Barnabas noticing the three children.

"I'll leave you alone with them," said Elizabeth. She went into her study.

"Hello, you must be Barnabas Collins," said Violet.

"Yes I am Barnabas, I am flattered that you already know my name," said Barnabas.

"You look exactly the same as your ancestor in the portrait behind you," said Klaus.

Barnabas turned around to the portrait. It looked a little strange, possibly since he is no longer under the vampire curse.

"Yes there is definitely an uncanny resemblance between myself and the original Barnabas Collins," said Barnabas.

"I'm Violet," said Violet, holding out her hand.

"Violet, what a beautiful name," said Barnabas, shaking Violet's hand.

"Thank you. This is my brother Klaus and my sister Sunny," said Violet, gesturing towards her brother and baby sister.

Sunny babbled something that meant "Nice to meet you Barnabas Collins. Can I bite your cane?" Violet and Klaus bursted out into laughter.

"What's making you two laugh?" asked Barnabas.

"Nothing, just something that popped in our heads," said Klaus.

"Well, would you kids want to visit me tomorrow and see my house," said Barnabas.

"We'd love to," said Klaus.

* * *

Meanwhile, Vicki and Carolyn were spending the evening eating at the Blue Whale. A familiar tune was playing on the jukebox.

"Is is true that the Baudelaire's were to arrive today at Collinwood, as indicated by the letter we found lying around in David's room?" asked Carolyn.

"Yes, I spoke to your mother about it and she confirmed it. She had already told Barnabas and Julia about it," replied Vicki.

"That's just what we need, more kids playing around Collinwood, finding out every secret about the house," said Carolyn with a hint of anger in her voice.

"Your mother mentioned that the eldest one was due to receive a vast fortune upon turning 18 and that their parents died in a massive fire that destroyed their mansion a couple of months back," said Vicki.

"That's very sad. Why can't they live in an orphanage?" said Carolyn sarcastically.

"The letter also said that there was a man named Count Olaf that is after the family fortune," said Vicki. She reached into her purse and took out a photo. The photo was of a middle-aged hook-nosed man with a unibrow.

"Is that how Count Olaf looks like. He looks like a very strange man," said Carolyn. Her expression changed from sarcasm to fear.

"Strange hardly describes him. Something tells me that Count Olaf may be on his way to Collinsport right now to get the Baudelaires," said Vicki. Both girls looked at each other in fear.

* * *

Later that night, Violet is having trouble falling asleep. She, like Klaus and Sunny, is worried that Count Olaf may show up any minute. All three children know that Olaf may use another disguise to help him with his evil plan to take them and get the family fortune. She finally falls asleep an hour later.

Violet suddenly found herself in the foyer, unable to sleep. She walked into the drawing room and sat down in one of the chairs.

There was a knock on the door. She answered the door and it was Count Olaf. He was looking very pleased.

"Hello Violet, we meet again," said Olaf.

"Oh no you don't!" shouted Violet. She slammed the doors shut. As soon as she turned away, the doors flew open. Olaf entered the foyer.

"Why did you close the door on me. This is my house now," said Olaf with glee.

"This house belongs to the Collins family. Where's Mrs. Stoddard?" asked Violet.

"Elizabeth Collins Stoddard and her brother Roger are indisposed of, permanently," said Olaf.

"What do you mean?" asked Violet.

"Why my dear Violet, they're dead," said Olaf.

"WHAT!" shouted Violet.

"They signed the entire Collinwood estate over to me before I killed them," said Olaf.

Violet was petrified with fear. Olaf seemed to become happier.

"Who's at the door?" shouted Klaus as he arrived at the landing.

"Hello Klaus," said Olaf.

"What are you doing here!" yelled Klaus.

"Why this estate belongs to me of course, and so does your precious fortune!" yelled Olaf with triumph. He started to laugh an evil laugh.

Violet suddenly woke up screaming. She remembered every detail of that dream.

* * *

That's it for Chapter 2. Chapter 3 should be up shortly. More Dark Shadows characters will appear in later chapters, along with Count Olaf and a couple of original characters.


	3. Chapter 3

**The Unfortunate Orphans  
**

**Chapter 3**

A surprise guest is staying at the Collinsport Inn and Count Olaf is on his way to Collinsport. Barnabas and Julia discuss of a course of action to keep Count Olaf away from the estate. There is another surprise towards the end of the chapter.

* * *

_"On this night at Collinwood, Violet Baudelaire has a nightmare that terrified her, a nightmare that Count Olaf murdered Elizabeth Collins Stoddard and Roger Collins and had forced them to sign over the Collins estate just before their deaths. Vicki and Carolyn fear that Count Olaf is on his way to Collinsport right now to try another trick that might well give him custody of the Baudelaires and their family fortune."_

Violet screamed at the top of her lungs as she woke up from a terrible nightmare.

"Count Olaf cannot take over Collinwood! He can't!" shouted Violet.

Just then, Klaus entered the room to see what Violet was screaming about.

"What's wrong Violet?" asked Klaus.

"I had a dream that Count Olaf murdered Mrs. Stoddard and Roger Collins and they signed the estate over to him," said Violet.

"I won't be surprised if he does just that," said Klaus. "Every time we move to a new place, he seems to find us not long afterwards."

* * *

In a room in the Collinsport Inn, a man named Lemony Snicket is sitting at a desk reading a book named Collins Family History Volume One.

_Both the Collins family and the Baudelaire family were close friends from the early eighteenth century until mid 1795 when the Baudelaire family moved away from Collinsport. The Baudelaires helped the Collins family design and build their first mansion in 1745 which is now called the Old House. They helped Joshua Collins design a new and much larger mansion in the early 1790's, but never got to see the finished mansion as they had moved away by time it completed construction in 1796.  
_

Lemony was writing notes in a journal until all of a sudden, the pen seemed to run out of ink.

"Damn it, why does this pen have to do this every single time I try to write," said Lemony.

Lemony tried to write more, but nothing came out of the pen. He was starting to get frustrated.

"Come on, I know there's more ink in this pen," he said.

He turned the pen around and it splashed his face with ink, just like pens do occasionally in Three Stooges shorts.

"Goddamn it!" he yelled as he stalked into the bathroom to wash his face off. He was obviously having bad luck with his pen today. His pen never failed him until he began staying at the Collinsport Inn. After all, he heard the rumors from the townspeople that Collinwood was haunted. Lemony was a man who doesn't believe in ghosts, and would need plenty of evidence for him to be convinced.

He sat back down at his desk and read a letter from Elizabeth Collins Stoddard

_Dear Lemony Snicket,_

_I have read your letter and recognize the danger that the kids are in with that Count Olaf, if you can call him a count, after them and their money. I will take precautions and I ensure you that Count Olaf will have a very tough time trying to get into Collinwood. I installed modern locks for all exterior doors to make it harder to break into the house. I am aware of the disguises that Olaf uses. I have enlisted the aid of the entire Collins family to help protect the Baudelaires from Count Olaf. I hope that Olaf is stopped once and for all. Thank you for warning me about Count Olaf.  
_

_Sincerely,  
Elizabeth Collins Stoddard_

"I hope the Collins family will defeat Count Olaf once and for all. I have faith in them and that is why I told Arthur Poe to take them to Collinwood," Lemony said.

* * *

Just as the sun rose, Count Olaf was driving in his Chrysler Imperial heading towards Collinsport. He knew that the Baudelaires were staying at Collinwood and he was determined to get that family fortune, even if it meant killing off the entire Collins family and taking over the estate to do so.

"Those kids won't even know what got them this time," Olaf said with glee. "Those damn Collinses won't stand a chance against me and my tricks and disguises."

He was unaware that he was going 90 and the speed limit was 55. Little did he know that a police car was hiding in the bushes and emerged once he raced past. It wasn't until he heard the siren that he noticed what he was doing wrong.

"Oopsie, I was going a little too fast," he said. He pulled the Imperial over and turned the engine off. A single police officer approached the Imperial and knocked on the window. Olaf hit the power window switch only to realize that he shut the ignition off, hence the windows will not open. He turned the ignition back on and opened the windows.

"Did you know how fast you were going?" asked the officer.

"I didn't realize that I was speeding officer. I was just trying to get to Collinsport before dusk," said Olaf.

"Why are you in a hurry? Collinsport is over six hundred miles away," asked the officer.

"Oh, I didn't realize that," lied Olaf.

"There is no way you can get to Collinsport before dark going that far. You'll have to stop and get gas eventually," said the officer.

"That's true officer," said Olaf.

"Here's a citation and you better watch your speed sir," said the officer.

"Good day sir," said Olaf. He started the engine and sped off.

"What's up with that man?" the officer said aloud to himself.

Olaf continued down the road and was smiling to himself of his plans to get the Baudelaire fortune.

"Nothing's going to stop me getting that family fortune," Olaf said with glee.

* * *

Later that morning, the Baudelaires were at the Old House discussing their adventures with Barnabas. They told them of staying with Olaf and how he tried to marry Violet to get the fortune, but thwarted the plan by using her left hand to sign the marriage contract. They had the most fun talking about Montgomery Montgomery and his collection of reptiles. Finally, they discussed the events that happened when they were with Aunt Josephine and how her house was destroyed by a hurricane.

"Fascinating story. You kids really did outwit Olaf three times already," said Barnabas. He was surprised upon hearing their story.

"Yeah, and he keeps coming after us. He will stop at nothing from getting our family fortune," said Klaus.

Sunny babbled something that meant "Why does this house have no electricity or plumbing?"

"Trust me, we will use everything in our power to help protect you and your fortunes from the whim of Count Olaf," said Barnabas.

"Count Olaf is known to use disguises and clever tricks," said Violet.

"We know, Mrs. Stoddard told us and is prepared to send Count Olaf away each time he tries to visit," said Julia.

"I only hope that Olaf will learn that he can't get our family fortune," said Violet. She had an expression of doubt on her face as she said those words.

* * *

Late that afternoon, Julia and Barnabas discussed the situation after Barnabas took the Baudelaires back to Collinwood.

"Julia, we need to decide on a way of making sure Olaf cannot get on the grounds," said Barnabas as he sat in his chair thinking. Too bad he wasn't a vampire anymore as he could have put Olaf under his control and eventually kill him.

"Let's call Professor Stokes, i'm sure he'll know what to do," said Julia.

Julia picked up the telephone on the desk and called Professor Stokes.

"Eliot, could you please come to the Old House immediately?" asked Julia.

_"What is the reason?" said Stokes._

"I'd rather not tell you over the phone, just come to the Old House," said Julia.

_"Okay. I'm on my way,"_ replied Stokes.

"See you when you get here. Bye," said Julia. She hung up the phone.

* * *

There was a knock at the door ten minutes later.

"It must be Professor Stokes," said Barnabas. He got up out of his chair and opened the door.

"Good afternoon Professor Stokes," said Barnabas.

"Good afternoon Mr. Collins. May I come in," said Stokes.

"Certainly. Julia and I have much to discuss with you," said Barnabas, gesturing for Stokes to come into the house. Stokes entered the old mansion and followed Barnabas to the parlor.

"We have a situation at Collinwood that you might like to hear about?" asked Julia.

"Go on," said Stokes. Stokes has an interest in the occult and also magical creatures.

"Three orphans moved into Collinwood yesterday afternoon," said Barnabas. "Their names are Violet Baudelaire, Klaus Baudelaire, and Sunny Baudelaire."

"Weren't the Baudelaires living in Collinsport in the late 1700's?" asked Stokes.

"Yes, but they moved away in 1796 just before modern Collinwood was finished and the original Barnabas Collins moved to England," replied Barnabas.

"This is interesting," said Stokes.

"Anyway, the parents of the Baudelaire orphans died a few months ago and they are being pursued by a man with the name of Count Olaf," said Barnabas.

"Who's Count Olaf?" asked Stokes.

"We don't know much about him except for that he is after the Baudelaire fortune and will stop at nothing to get it. He is known to use disguises to sneak his way into the homes of the people the kids were staying with. He murdered Montgomery Montgomery, one of the kids uncles. He nearly murdered Aunt Josephine, but she survived," said Barnabas.

"Fascinating story," replied Stokes.

"Is there any way we can keep Olaf away from the grounds and from committing another murder?" asked Barnabas.

"That is extremely difficult to do with a man like him, even with police guarding the grounds," Stokes replied.

"Eliot, there must be another way to keep Olaf off the grounds," Julia said.

Both her and Barnabas had looks of concern on their faces.

"Yes, there is a way, but I will have to travel to Europe to get two people that can live here in the Old House and guard the grounds," said Stokes.

"What are their names?" asked Julia.

"Their names are Gabrielle and Katherine," said Stokes. "Have either of you read legends about slavic fairies known under many names, today as the veela?"

"I am somewhat familiar," said Barnabas.

"You can take that knowledge from the bookcase and throw it into the fireplace as those legends and myths are mostly incorrect," said Stokes. You see, veela are magical creatures that greatly resemble the human female. They are incredibly beautiful and are irresistible to most men. However, if one loses her temper, they transform into bird-like creatures and are known to throw fireballs."

"Fireballs?" asked Barnabas.

"The magic of the Veela consists of two forms, fire and love," replied Stokes. "Fire is what give them their powers. They can transform into their bird-like form not only when they lose control of their temper, but when they are fighting. Love gives them their loyalty, compassion and their ability to read other people's emotions much more accurately than any human can.

"Other abilities of the Veela include incredible healing powers, and the ability to repair damage caused by their fireballs. For example, say a veela lost her temper here in the Old House and burned many of the rooms to ashes. She can repair the damaged rooms by using her powers and the Old House is back to the way it was before she lost her temper. She usually makes most human witnesses forget what she did if she accidentally burned something personal and repaired it. You can request her to not make you forget the incident if you'd like."

"Incredible, I think that this idea of yours might actually work," said Barnabas. "How soon can you bring the two Veela here?"

"It'll take at least a week, two at the most to bring Gabrielle and Katherine here. I will go to Europe immediately if you'd like," said Stokes.

"Please get them and bring them back as soon as possible," said Barnabas. There was a hint of excitement and impatience in his voice.

"Okay Mr. Collins..."

"Barnabas if you'd please," said Barnabas.

"Okay Barnabas, I'll get a plane to Europe as soon as possible and be back in about a week or two," said Stokes.

"Good luck Eliot," said Julia as Barnabas led Stokes to the door.

As soon as Stokes left, both Julia and Barnabas were both excited and a little worried.

"I didn't know that was the true story of the Veela," said Barnabas. "Many of the legends and myths portrayed them as seductresses that eat young men or children."

"Looks can be deceiving Barnabas," said Julia.

"Apparently so," said Barnabas.

* * *

This is the end of the chapter and I hope you liked my surprise. Gabrielle and Katherine, the two veela, won't appear in the story until after Olaf has arrived in Collinsport and tried at least one of his tricks to get the Baudelaire fortune. With that said, Chapter 4 should be up soon.


	4. Chapter 4

**The Unfortunate Orphans  
**

**Chapter 4**

Roger rants and raves over veela coming to Collinwood. Klaus has the same dream Violet had the night before. Olaf finally makes it to Collinsport. I am raising the rating of the story to T because of some innuendos that happen in this chapter.

* * *

_"It is evening at Collinwood. Barnabas and Julia told the rest of the family at Collinwood about their plans to bring two veela to Collinwood keep Count Olaf off the Collins estate. It will take at least a week for Professor Stokes to bring the veela to Collinsport and Olaf will arrive in Collinsport in two days at the most. It is possible that Olaf might get the Baudelaires and the family fortune before the week is over, but the Collins family will not go without a fight."  
_

"Veela, what nonsense is that giving such a name to a certain group of people. I'm sure that they are just two extremely beautiful young ladies who are very temperamental, yet sweet. I don't believe that they have powers such as transforming into weird birds capable of burning down Collinwood and repairing the damage. That is double nonsense," ranted Roger in his pompous tone of voice. He was in the drawing room with Elizabeth.

"I don't believe in slavic fairies either Roger, but we will have to wait to see how Gabrielle and Katherine are like," said Elizabeth. She walked over to the window and opened it. "I do hope that they visit Collinwood often and get to know the family even if they are staying at the Old House with Barnabas and guarding the grounds."

"I don't know what to believe anymore to be honest," said Roger calmly.

"I hope you don't act that way when you meet Gabrielle and Katherine. God knows how they'll react," said Elizabeth.

"So what are we going to do about that Count Olaf guy before the two so called veela girls are to arrive in Collinsport?" asked Roger.

"I did change the locks on all outside doors of Collinwood, even those that aren't used anymore, which will make it more difficult for him to get into Collinwood," replied Elizabeth.

"What about the Old House? I'm sure Olaf might find a hiding spot there," said Roger.

"I'm sure Barnabas has taken precautions of his own," said Elizabeth.

"I hope so Liz, because from what I heard, that Count Olaf character is very sneaky," said Roger.

* * *

Meanwhile, Count Olaf is continuing to drive towards Collinsport in his Chrysler Imperial. Currently, he is only about two hundred miles away from Collinsport. He can easily make it to Collinsport by midnight. Since he got that speeding ticket, he has been watching his speed very carefully so that he won't get any more delays and speeding tickets.

"Good, I'll be in Collinsport before midnight. I'll just check into the Collinsport Inn and then disguise myself and go to Collinwood tomorrow/ Yes, that sounds like the most brilliant plan I have ever devised. They'll never know that it is I, Count Olaf on the Collins estate," Olaf said to himself.

Just then, the car ran out of gasoline. The engine died all of a sudden.

"Just another minor setback. Just another setback," said Olaf. "Goddammit, it is a serious setback! I must keep this car rolling until it comes to a stop and then get out and get my gas can out of the trunk and use the fuel in it to get to a gas station. Then I'll be on my merry way to Collinsport."

The car's speed slowly decreased until it came to a complete stop after about a mile. Olaf got out of the Imperial and got the gas can out of the trunk and put the fuel in the gas tank. He was then on his way to the next gas station, which was about a half hour away.

The engine died again a half hour later, but fortunately at a gas station. Olaf did push the Imperial to a fuel pump and managed. Unforunately for him, it was a self-serve gas station, which meant another few minutes of delay for Olaf. He almost put in regular gas before realizing that the car took premium gas. Soon, he was heading to Collinsport with a full tank of gasoline.

* * *

That night, Klaus had the same dream that Violet had the night before.

Klaus suddenly found herself in the foyer, unable to sleep. He walked into the drawing room and sat down in one of the chairs.

There was a knock on the door. He answered the door and it was Count Olaf.

"Hello Klaus, we meet again," said Olaf.

"Oh no you don't!" shouted Klaus. He slammed the doors shut.

"VIOLET! OLAF'S BACK!" yelled Kalus

Suddenly, the doors flew open. Olaf entered the foyer.

"Why did you close the door on me. This is my house now," said Olaf with glee.

"This house belongs to the Collins family. Where's Mrs. Stoddard?" asked Klaus.

"Elizabeth Collins Stoddard and her brother Roger are indisposed of, permanently," said Olaf.

"What do you mean?" asked Klaus.

"Why my dear Klaus, they're dead," said Olaf.

"WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE WITH THEM YOU EVIL BASTARD!" shouted Violet.

"They signed the entire Collinwood estate over to me before I killed them," said Olaf.

Klaus was petrified with fear. Olaf seemed to become happier.

"Who's at the door?" shouted Violet as she arrived at the landing.

"Hello Violet," said Olaf.

"What are you doing here! I'll call the police if you don't leave!" yelled Violet.

"Why this estate belongs to me of course, and so does your precious fortune!" yelled Olaf with triumph. He started to laugh an evil laugh.

Klaus woke up screaming. He then realized that Violet had the same dream the previous night. He bolted out of his bedroom and stalked right into the next one.

"VIOLET! WAKE UP!" shouted Klaus.

Violet woke with a start.

"What happened Klaus? You're sounding as if Count Olaf broke into Collinwood," said Violet.

"I had the same dream that you had last night," said Klaus.

"No way," said Violet. "I guess we really are very worried about Count Olaf taking over Collinwood."

"You can say that again," said Klaus.

Sunny babbled something that meant "I guess we really are very worried about Count Olaf taking over Collinwood."

"What's all the noise for?" Vicki asked as she entered the bedroom.

"I had a nightmare about Count Olaf taking over Collinwood to get our family fortune," said Klaus.

"At least it was a dream," said Vicki.

"But the fear of Olaf taking over Collinwood is something he would do to get our family fortune," said Klaus.

Sunny babbled something that meant "Klaus is right. I'd like to see Vicki and Carolyn making out just to see Klaus melt."

"Sunny, you're making me blush," said Klaus. He was blushing furiously of the thought of Vicki and Carolyn making out.

"What are you embarassed about?" asked Vicki.

"You don't want to know," said Klaus.

"At least you aren't scared anymore," said Vicki. She held onto Klaus and gave him a nice warm hug.

"Thanks Vicki," said Klaus.

"Well, if you feel up to it, you can go back to your room and try to sleep again," said Vicki.

"I'll stay with Violet for a few minutes and then go to bed," said Klaus.

"That sounds like a plan," said Vicki. She left the bedroom and closed the door softly behind her.

* * *

Just then, Olaf arrived in Collinsport. He was getting tired enough that he found it hard to drive. He nearly crashed into another car, but managed to avoid it. Unfortunately, the car crashed into a bucket of nails, which spread over the road, causing all the tires on Olaf's car to pop.

"DAMN IT! I DON'T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!" yelled Olaf as he heard loud squealing as the tires disintegrated into shreds. He quickly got out of the car and saw that all four tires are completely gone.

"SHIT! NOW I HAVE NO TIRES!" Olaf screamed into the night sky. He wondered how he was going to get the car to the Collinsport Inn with no tires.

"What's the matter," said a woman. She was very beautiful and had brown eyes and brown hair.

"Pardon me ma'am for screaming into the night sky and waking the town, but I have no tires for my car and I am trying to get to the Collinsport Inn. I need tires in order to get my car to the inn," said Olaf.

"I'll get pop to call a tow truck and get your car to a repair shop and get him to drive you to the inn," she said.

"Maggie, what's the fuss about," said a man's voice.

"This man lost all the tires on his car and he needs a lift to the Collinsport Inn," said Maggie.

"Hello sir, My name's Sam Evans," said the man.

"My name is Count Olaf," he said, bowing to Sam.

"You aren't another Collins are you?" asked Sam.

"No, I am planning to visit them tomorrow," said Olaf.

"I am sorry for thinking that you were a Collins. Unpack your stuff and put them in my car and I'll drive you to the inn," said Sam.

"You left your engine on," said Maggie. She opened the driver's door of the Imperial and switched the engine off. She gave the keys to Olaf.

"Thanks," said Olaf.

"You're welcome," said Maggie.

A few minutes later, the Imperial was on a flatbed tow truck.

"You're lucky that there is a repair shop in Collinsport. It's not much, but it offers excellent service," said the tow truck driver.

About an hour later, Olaf was in his room at the Collinsport Inn.

"Damn, that accursed car hit a bucket of nails. If that didn't happen, I would be here over an hour earlier. I hate delays," said Olaf.

* * *

That morning, the Baudelaires sat in the formal dining room, which was recently restored at the request of Barnabas. The room was much larger than the drawing room and had three sets of double doors exactly like those that were in the drawing room. Vicki, Roger, and Elizabeth were also sitting at the table eating their breakfast. Sunny was sitting in one of Carolyn's old high chairs between Klaus and Violet.

"Let's place a bet to see if our dear Count Olaf will arrive in Collinwood this morning. I'd love to throw him out myself," said Roger.

"Roger loves saying bad jokes," said Elizabeth to the Baudelaires.

Sunny said something that meant "I don't like you much Roger. You frighten me."

"Quiet Sunny," Violet said softly.

Sunny said something that meant "Klaus, get Carolyn and Vicki to make..."

"Not now Sunny," interrupted Klaus. He started blushing again. Fortunately for him, Carolyn was in Bangor with David. He would be blushing even more had Carolyn been present.

"What's Sunny saying?" asked Elizabeth.

"You don't want to know the answer Mrs. Stoddard," said Vicki.

"Really," said Elizabeth.

"It's probably something related to two girls making out, probably my niece Carolyn and Vicki," said Roger.

"Roger, that was rude of you to say in front of the kids," said Elizabeth.

"You don't have to scold me Liz," said Roger.

By now, Vicki was blushing furiously as well.

"Roger, how could you say such a thing," said Vicki.

Sunny babbled something that meant "Go Roger, get the blond and the brunette to make out."

"Sunny," said Violet. She was now blushing as well.

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"Count Olaf!" said Violet.

"It might be, but I'll answer the door. You guys follow me to make sure he isn't in one of his disguises," said Elizabeth.

Elizabeth opened the door, and it appeared to be an elderly man. The elderly man had a hook nose and a unibrow.

"Hi, I came to Collinwood to look at this beautiful house. I am into old mansions," said the man.

"Oh my god! You're Count Olaf in disguise!" shouted Klaus.

* * *

That's the end of Chapter 4. I am not going to tell you if that was Count Olaf or just an old man that looks like him. You're gonna have to read the next chapter to find out. Two chapters in one day, I can hardly believe it. Well, this fanfic is in soap opera format anyway, so updates should be frequent. Chapter 5 should be up soon, hopefully sometime tomorrow. I will work on part of Chapter 5 tonight.


	5. Chapter 5

**The Unfortunate Orphans  
**

**Chapter 5  
**

Count Olaf's disguise did not work, and the family discuss what he might do next to get the Baudelaires' family fortune before help is due to arrive.

* * *

_"It is morning at Collinwood. Count Olaf has made his way to Collinsport, but not without problems. Meanwhile, as the Baudelaires eat breakfast in Collinwood's recently restored dining room, there is a knock at the door, and the children fear that it is Count Olaf."_

Just then, there was a knock at the door.

"Count Olaf!" said Violet.

"It might be, but I'll answer the door. You guys follow me to make sure he isn't in one of his disguises," said Elizabeth.

Elizabeth opened the doors and it appeared to be an elderly man. The elderly man had a hook nose and a unibrow.

"Hi, I came to Collinwood to look at this beautiful house. I am into old mansions," said the man.

"Oh my god! You're Count Olaf in disguise!" shouted Klaus. "You can try to enter this house, but no one here will let you in."

"That's very disrespectful treating an old man like that young man!" said the man.

"You do look like Count Olaf, so will you please get off this property before I call the police on you," said Elizabeth firmly.

"I think you are mistaking me for that weirdo Count Olaf. Since you think I am Olaf, I'll go away," said the man.

Elizabeth closed the doors and locked them with both locks.

"Was that truly Count Olaf," said Elizabeth. "If he isn't, I just rudely sent an innocent old man out that wanted to look at this house."

"That was Count Olaf, believe me," said Klaus.

The Baudelaires went upstairs and disappeared from sight.

"Then I did the right thing and sent that man away," said Elizabeth. "It feels like I am rejecting somebody just because they are different. I hate it when people do that to others."

"Liz, did our dear Count Olaf arrive," said Roger in a sarcastic tone of voice.

"Yes he did, and I sent him away," said Elizabeth. She has a slightly sad expression on her face.

"Oh don't feel said Liz. Let's give the kids root beer, and you and I have sherries," said Roger.

"I'll have Mrs. Johnson get the kids some root beer while we have our sherries," said Elizabeth.

* * *

Later that morning, Barnabas arrived from the Old House at Elizabeth's request.

"Barnabas, Count Olaf arrived in Collinsport this morning. He tried to gain access to the house by disguising himself as an old man," said Elizabeth.

"Really," said Barnabas. "I saw an old man walking through the woods towards the gates earlier."

"Good, Count Olaf better stay away from the Collins estate. When did you say the two girls are going to arrive?" asked Elizabeth.

"Sometime next week," said Barnabas. "I'm sure you'll find them very charming, especially you Roger."

"Why would I fancy myself with two young girls," said Roger sarcastically.

"Please excuse Roger, he has been saying stuff like this since you announced that the girls were going to come to Collinwood," said Elizabeth.

"I understand, would it include sexual innuendos by any change?" asked Barnabas curiously.

"Innuendos, what nonsense are you talking about Barnabas," ranted Roger.

"Just curious Roger," said Barnabas.

"They say that curiosity killed the cat," said Roger.

"I am familiar with that statement," said Barnabas. "So, how are the children?"

"They are upstairs if you'd like to see them," said Elizabeth.

"No thank you. I'd better be getting back to the Old House. I am expecting a phone call from Professor Stokes," said Barnabas.

"I understand Barnabas," said Elizabeth.

Barnabas left Collinwood and headed back to the Old House.

* * *

That evening, Barnabas was on the phone with Professor Stokes, who just arrived in Europe.

"How was your journey to Europe?" asked Barnabas.

_"It went smoothly for the most part,"_ said Stokes._ "Right now, I am with Gabrielle. We just need to find Katherine and perhaps ask another veela to use her allure on me as a prank on myself."_

"A prank on yourself?" asked Barnabas

_"I just felt like doing a little prank to make myself laugh. You know that laughter is good for the mind,"_ said Stokes.

"I see. When do you expect to be back with Gabrielle and Katherine?" asked Barnabas.

_"Probably five days from now, which is next Monday,"_ said Stokes.

"I'll see you on Monday with Katherine and Gabrielle," said Barnabas. "Goodbye."

He hung up the phone, walked across the parlor and sat down in his chair.

"Barnabas," said a man's voice.

"Yes Willie," said Barnabas.

"I checked the house for signs of Count Olaf and he ain't in this house at all. I checked the basement, the main floor, and the upper floors," said Willie.

"Good," said Barnabas. He was happy that Olaf hadn't shown up yet at the Old House.

"When are the two veela going to show up? I'm anxious to meet them," said Willie.

"Yes, I'm sure you are," said Barnabas, fighting back a smile. He knew that the veela would likely blast his servant with their allure just for the fun of it.

"It is nice to have more people living at this house for a change," said Willie. "It has been uh-so lonely here. We won't be so lonely next week."

"You just have to be patient Willie. Stokes is trying to bring them here as soon as possible," said Barnabas.

"What if Count Olaf gets the children before the veela show up? He might return to Collinwood in a disguise that would fool everybody living there," said Willie, worrying about the Baudelaires.

"I haven't thought of that before, how stupid of me," said Barnabas.

"At least now you know what we're up against Barnabas," said Willie.

"Now we do," said Barnabas.

* * *

Meanwhile, Olaf's car has been repaired and he is not pleased with the price of the repairs. The Imperial looked just like it did before, with shiny black paint, acres of shiny chrome trim, four wide whitewall tires, and no evidence that the car ever ran over a wooden bucket filled with nails.

"I had to replace all four wheels, the grille, the front bumper, as well as putting four new wide whitewall tires on your car," said the mechanic. "I also had to remove several small dents on the hood and touch up the paint. The total price is five hundred dollars."

"Five hundred dollars!" exclaimed Olaf.

"Certain parts for Chrysler Imperials are very expensive," said the mechanic.

"Well, I've got five hundred dollars of good old American cash coming right up," said Olaf. He digged into his wallet and took out five one-hundred dollar bills.

"Ah Benjamin Franklin, I have to take five hundred bucks away from you." Olaf said as he handed the money to the mechanic.

Olaf then drove the Imperial to the Collinsport Inn, got out of the car, and walked into the inn.

"I just got my car back from the shop. It was quite expensive, but the service was excellent. You can reach me at room number 20," Olaf said to nobody in particular as he entered the inn and walked up the stairs to his room.

"I did enjoy that long walk to Collinwood and back, but with my car back, I can get there and back much quicker," Olaf said to himself. He walked into his room and closed the door behind him.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the Evans Cottage, Maggie and Sam talk about Count Olaf.

"Maggie, did you notice anything strange about Count Olaf?" asked Sam. He had a puzzled look on his face.

"Yeah, he did seem to be in a hurry to get to the Collinsport Inn," said Maggie. "It was like he was on a strict schedule, but kept running into bad luck forcing him to be behind schedule."

"I wonder why he was on such a strict schedule," said Sam.

"Maybe he had an urgent appointment here and he needed a good night's sleep," said Maggie.

"That seems most likely. Perhaps he had an appointment up at Collinwood early in the morning," said Sam.

"That could be, he could know the Collins family. Perhaps we should call Collinwood and see if they know Count Olaf," said Maggie

"No Maggie, I don't think so," said Sam. "Let them find out for themselves."

"But Pop, he could be after something at Collinwood," said Maggie.

"I don't think so. I think he is just a normal man with some strange habits, not some kind of thief," said Sam.

"I don't know Pop. Something is telling me that Count Olaf is after something at Collinwood, and I'd like to know what it is," said Maggie.

* * *

Back at the Old House, two more people were discussing the topic of Count Olaf.

"Barnabas, what if Count Olaf tries another trick to get the family fortune before the Veela arrive on Monday," said Julia.

"We can only be constantly vigilant and figure out the types of disguises Count Olaf uses," said Barnabas. "So far, he disguised himself as Montgomery Montgomery's friend, a ship's captain, and an old man with an interest in old houses."

"We need to figure out what kind of car he drives," said Julia. "I've heard he is rich, so he might drive an Imperial, a Jaguar, a Lincoln, or a Cadillac. Anyway, do you think that the kids are safe from Count Olaf in the meantime?"

"Perhaps. Perhaps not. It depends on how tricky Count Olaf is and how smart the family back at Collinwood is at detecting his disguises," said Barnabas.

"That does make sense. The Baudelaires are very good at detecting Count Olaf's disguises, Elizabeth said so herself," said Julia.

"It seems like they have things under control for the time being. The question is how long will it take for Count Olaf to find a disguise that would fool even the Baudelaires? It could be days, weeks, or even months before he finds that perfect disguise, gets into Collinwood and gets his hands on the family fortune," said Barnabas.

* * *

Sorry for this chapter being late. Chapter 6 should hopefully be posted soon.


End file.
